Getting Through It All

Everyone has bad days; but when you are depressed or your bad days start to outnumber your good days, it can be harder to get yourself back on track. I’m lucky. I like to think that I’m doing pretty good right now.  I have more good days than bad, and that’s a huge improvement from just months ago. I have a roommate that is a super positive person and she’s a good influence on me. Some days it’s only the expectations of others that get you out of bed, you know?

Yesterday and today though, have been particularly difficult for me for some reason. So today, as I struggled, I found myself grasping for the tools I have been using to help me stay positive, and I thought I’d share some of them with you.

Much Too Long

It’s been much too long between posts and I apologize.  There was much upheaval and I’m still refocusing myself. 

I have though, worked on another swap package since my last post.  This was the Disney Swap on Craftster and was lucky enough to be blessed with a wonderful swap partner.  For her I created three art pieces using key words and Disney characters. Tinkerbell is her favorite character and I really do love her; but of the pieces I sent I have to say that the Belle one is my favorite.  I also made a tic tac toe set out of felt for her children.  The artwork is on a cotton/poly blend and is crayon tinted,  hand embroidered and then watercolors were used.  I’m not a big fan of glitter, but these pieces called out for a touch of it to finish them off.

 

 

 

Since my last post my daughter has graduated from Junior High and is now “officially” in high school.  Someone please save me. Really. I’m serious now.  I just got over the shock and dismay of finding out about her first boyfriend and now THIS? Really.

Not sure which quote fits this moment better:

Making the decision to have a child is momentous.  It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. 

- Elizabeth Stone

OR

It kills you to see them grow up.  But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn’t.  – Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams

This weekend is Father’s Day and I have to admit I miss my Dad.  We’ve been out of touch for a while due to some old issues between us and, I rarely admit it, it’s hard on me.  Growing up I was “Daddy’s Girl” and despite all of our differences, I love him with all of my heart.  Unfortunately growing up is not without it’s growing pains…sometimes for both parent and child.

 

Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. - Gloria Naylor

 

I’ll leave you with a couple of sites to visit at your leisure.  During my recent upheaval I’ve been working on maintaining a positive outlook on life.  These are some sites that help me do that.

Ode Magazine - For Intelligent Optimists: Check out their online content and sign up to receive their “Good News” newsletter in your inbox.

Daily Good:  Positive news and inspiration from around the world.

Ted.com:  Ideas worth spreading. I’m hooked on all of the videos.  Awesome stuff.

Well, I hope I made up somewhat for the long break.  Hope everyone is dong well!

Cheers!

You Reading This, Be Ready

 

Starting here, what do you want to remember?
How sunlight creeps along a shining floor?
What scent of old wood hovers, what softened
sound from outside fills the air?

Will you ever bring a better gift for the world
than the breathing respect that you carry
wherever you go right now? Are you waiting
for time to show you some better thoughts?

When you turn around, starting here, lift this
new glimpse that you found; carry into evening
all that you want from this day. This interval you
spent reading or hearing this, keep it for life -

What can anyone give you greater than now,
starting here, right in this room, when you turn around?

William Stafford
(1914-1993)

 

In the last month I’ve had a lot of changes happen in my life. Mostly for the better. Tonight, I joined Weight Watchers. Another positive change I’m dedicating myself to.  Sometimes I think, when you’re having a really hard time of it, you have to let go of a lot of negative things so you can hold on to the positive in your life.  That’s what I’m trying to do now. Choose the positive in my life, the good in my life.

Next…a walking group.

Meet George

I recently participated in a tea towel swap on Craftster.  My partner asked for Yeti’s to be the focus of the towels.  Man. You should have been in my brain when I read that.

WTF?! YETI’S ARE WHITE! TEA TOWELS ARE WHITE! WHAT THE HECK AM I SUPPOSE TO DO?

…was just one thing I thought during the beginning of the creative process. I searched high and low for something to spark my creativity and was really having a difficult time of it. I mean, I found a bunch of stuff. There’s no lacking for Yeti/Big Foot/Sasquatch stuff out there. Much of it very cutesy, gorey, ferocious…but that’s just not what I was looking for. I wanted something different.  Something that would just make me go…OH. You know?

I finally found it. A picture of Big Foot in a suit. I swear you never know when or why those creative synapses are going to fire!  My partner received today and so now I can post my pictures. All three are done on 100% cotton tea towels. Two of them were embellished after stitching using watercolor paints. The third one is embellished with acrylic felt.

George Sasquatch

Big Foot Xing

The Yeti

As is the norm, you can find more pictures on my Flickr.

Dear Parents,

 

Part of our jobs as parents is getting our children through hard times.  Everything from a scraped knee to the kids teasing them at school. Of course, it’s never easy for us as parents.  When our children hurt, we hurt.  We feel that knee burn as if it were our own and..if we can find that strength within us, we can be the strength they need.  We do them a disservice when we don’t give them our strength to lean on.

Remember this.  Because there will be those times that you will wonder how you can possibly watch them be in pain. You can’t possibly take one more tear before you go railing off into the night to attack whatever it was that hurt them. Don’t.

I know it’s hard.  You want to scream into the night, run straight over to the other parents who have to be responsible for their child being such a monster to inflict such pain upon your child. Again, don’t.

Find it within yourself to help your child find the path that will not only get them through this hurt, but make them stronger.  Sometimes all that entails is teaching them that blowing on the scraped knee can help ease the pain. Sometimes you have to just be there for them to lean on as they learn to get hurt and then move past it. 

How hard is it to explain to your child that you can’t make people change?  You can give them advice, but you can’t make them take it.  And sometimes…sometimes you have to just accept that they are going to make a bad decision, and then hope that they learn something from it. A lesson every single parent learns very, very well.

So parents, be the strength for your child in those times of hurt. Show them how to be strong, so that they may learn from it.  And then, those times when you mess up, give yourself some slack. You deserve that too.

 

I Give Good Stitch

Apparently I give good stitch ya’ll.  I am a great fan of Mr X Stitch, his work and his blog.  Not only does Jamie do some great needlework, his blog features some of the most amazing stitchers I’ve seen.  I love checking out his blog everyday and perusing older entries. So imagine how surprised I was to find a message in my Flickr mailbox from Mr X Stitch asking for a copy of my “X is for Xavier” ATC card to use TODAY on his blog!

Someone knock me over with a feather ya’ll.

My other two ATCs have been recieved and posted as well.

W is for Wahine is hand-stitched on cotton with a watercolor background.

V is for Vacuous has Miss Paris Hilton modeling for me.  She is hand-stitched and colored with pencils.

Now I’m working on designs for three cards for a fabric ATC swap, hoping to finalize those designs and start stitching over the weekend because crunch time is coming.  I’m also finalizing designs for a tea towel swap I’m participating on as well.  In between designing those I have some ideas I’m playing with based off of inspiration from a local magazine I love to pick up to read. Time to do some sketching.

I have a hard time doing sketching because I find my sketches to be so…juvenille.  Juvenille in the sense of being child-like…very elementary.  I’m working to get past that.

Personal Fortitude

This seems to be a theme of mine. Trying to remember that hardship can make you into a better person in the end. Today is one of those days where I am having to think very hard about the path yet to come, because the one I’m on right now is making me so very unhappy.   Then I come across a picture like this.  A simple moment of pleasure and happiness with my daughter, who has made my life so very, very rich.  Who could ask of life anything more?

So join with me in my mantra for the day, Douglas Malloch’s “Good Timber.”

Good Timber

The tree that never had to fight
For sun and sky and air and light,
But stood out in the open plain
And always got its share of rain,
Never became a forest king
But lived and died a scrubby thing.

The man who never had to toil
To gain and farm his patch of soil,
Who never had to win his share
Of sun and sky and light and air,
Never became a manly man
But lived and died as he began.

Good timber does not grow with ease,
The stronger wind, the stronger trees,
The further sky, the greater length,
The more the storm the more the strength.
By sun and cold, by rain and snow,
In trees and men good timbers grow.

Where thickest lies the forest growth
We find the patriarchs of both.
And they hold counsel with the stars
Whose broken branches show the scars
Of many winds and much of strife.
This is the common law of life.

One Day At A Time

In another one of Douglas Malloch’s poems I find a lesson I need to remind myself of way too often. I mean, I think that’s I’ve grown considerably in the way I deal with my fellow man on a day to day basis; but I find that in dealing with myself I am less tolerant and tend to linger upon things I should just let go of. In my search for expression through art I hope to learn to let go more often.  Reminding me that the state of today will not necessarily be how things will be two days from now.

I hope that you find inspiration in Malloch’s words as well and find it in yourself to live today for today and not hold on so tightly to the bad things that beset us along the way.

It’s Fine Today

Sure, this world is full of trouble
I ain’t said it ain’t.
Lord, I’ve had enough and double
Reason for complaint;
Rain and storm have come to fret me,
Skies are often gray;
Thorn and brambles have beset me
On the road-but say,
Ain’t it fine today?

What’s the use of always weepin’,
Making trouble last?
What’s the use of always keepin’
Thinkin’ of the past?
Each must have his tribulation-
Water with his wine;
Life, it ain’t no celebration,
Trouble?-I’ve had mine-
But today is fine!

It’s today that I am livin’,
Not a month ago.
Havin’; losin’; takin’; givin’;
As time wills it so.
Yesterday a cloud of sorrow
Fell across the way,
It may rain again tomorrow,
It may rain-but say,
Ain’t it fine today?

Friends

Sometimes you forget how much you enjoyed a person’s company.  I have a bad tendency to cut myself off from friends which has, over the years, made for sketchy contact with some of my favorite people.  This weekend, thanks to Facebook and my wonderful Toontown group A.T.T.A. (long story)  I was able to participate in a mini reunion of some of my friends from high school.

We met at a local dive bar that’s been there as long as any of us can remember, about ten or so of us came and went throughout the night.  I added several numbers to my phone and a couple of people to my Facebook friends.  We’re also planning a get together in June and another in August, with more people committing to coming as well as people flying out for the event in June!  We’re all excited!

We all lose friends.. we lose them in death, to distance and over time. But even though they may be lost, hope is not. The key is to keep them in your heart, and when the time is right, you can pick up the friendship right where you left off. Even the lost find their way home when you leave the light on.

-Amy Marie Walz

Poetry That Inspires

One of the first ways I found to express myself creatively was by writing bad poetry as a child and while I’ve found that I’m not TRULY a poet and never will be, that I enjoy poetry.  A while back, when I was still living in Fresno, I found a wonderful poem on the Big Yellow Farmhouse.  For a while it became my mantra.  I would read it out loud to myself every day to remind myself that it’s not always dark and doom and gloom.  Originally I thought the poet’s name was Douglas Matlock and could not find any information on him.  I finally got smart and did a web search for the first two lines of the poem and found that the poet was actually Douglas Malloch (1877 -1938).  I also was able to find several other poems by him that I find just as inspiring that I’ll be posting every couple of days to share with you.

I’m thinking about embroidering this poem with an intricate border to give to family members this Christmas.  I also found one that I would like to embroider for my brother for his birthday or Father’s Day to help keep him inspired.  Do you have a poem that inspires you?  A poet that is consistently your favorite?  Please share.

You Have To Believe

You have to believe in happiness,
Or happiness never comes.
I know that a bird chirps nonetheless,
When all he finds is crumbs.

You have to believe the buds will blow,
Believe in the grass in days of snow.
That’s the reason a bird can sing-
On his darkest day, he believes in Spring

You have to believe in happiness,
It isn’t an outward thing.
The Spring never makes the song, I guess,
As much the song the Spring.

Aye, many a heart could find content,
If it saw the joy on the road it went;
The joy ahead when it had to grieve,
For the joy is there – but you have to believe.